Grief

A week ago I went down to the clinic for my regular monthly OB checkup.  During a hastily scheduled ultrasound, it became very apparent that our baby had no heartbeat.  The ultrasound looked nothing at all like the two perfect ones I’d had at checkups the two months previous.  Our baby was gone.  It was not good.  Even though it was still tiny, that baby was very real to me, very loved, prayed for, and looked forward to. After a long night at the hospital, I came home broken, and I’ve lived through one of the most difficult weeks ever.  I haven’t ever grieved like this, and really,  I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.  There is a lot I have to say about this experience, but I’m not ready to write it out yet.

However, I’m thankful for my faith, God’s word that speaks truth when NOTHING makes sense, and the prayers of so many dear and caring friends.  I know it will get better.

I’m also super grateful for my amazing husband, Lake Superior waves washing into jagged rocks, my silly kids, and long lazy naps.