Grocery Delivery

Long before the days of the pandemic I had already discovered the glory of grocery delivery. It has truly been the singular most helpful thing to me these past couple of years, and I would choose the privilege of grocery delivery over house cleaning help any day, especially since the messy people I live with undo in no time flat any cleaning that does take place. From the start, I have been so, so grateful for grocery delivery. It saves me time. It saves me mental fatigue. It gets groceries to my house way faster than I ever could manage on my own, and we run out of things much more rarely because I’m not procrastinating having to go to the grocery store, a task I really dislike. I have been so, so happy these past couple of years to hand in-store grocery shopping off to someone else. Groceries dropped off on my front steps always make me smile.

Today our groceries appeared and I happened to see the delivery person outside the door. “I hope you really did really want all 27 bananas?” he asked me worriedly.

“Oh yes! I certainly did.”

His relief was palatable. “I thought you might have typed the wrong number into the app.”

“Nope! I just have a lot of banana-eaters around here.”

I didn’t even go into the fact that as soon as those bright green bananas turn ever so slightly ripe, they will be literally consumed in 48 hours, and I’ll never manage to get even one myself because I like my bananas nicely yellow with small brown spots,. They never last that long. I never get a banana. I never get to make banana bread. It’s like the monsters open their mouthes and . . . . snarf! 27 bananas are instantly consumed.

If the peels don’t make it into the compost, however, I make them skip bananas the next week.