Overheard: Recent Funny Conversations

Mr. TOF and I were at the beach, just the two of us.  He looked over at me.

Mr. TOF:  Mom, what kind of job DID you have before you had kids.

Me:  Well, I was a teacher at a school.  I taught kids to write better and read better, and I taught them how to play music and sing.  I loved that job!

Mr. TOF:  Hmm.  Did you ever want to be a (unintelligible word that I couldn’t figure out)?

Me:  Can you say that again?

Mr. TOF:  Did you even want to be a (unintelligible word that I couldn’t figure out)?

Me:  A what?

Mr. TOF:  A (unintelligible word I couldn’t figure out).

Me:  Hmmmm.  I’m still having trouble figuring it out.  Tell me more about that job.

Mr. TOF:  Mom!  You know!  It’s like when somebody says “Go do the dishes!” And you have to do the dishes.  And they say, “Clean that up!” and you have to clean that up.  And they say “Mow the lawn!” and you have to mow the lawn.  Whatever they say you have to do right away.

Me:  Oh!  Do you mean a slave?

Mr. TOF:  Yeah!  That’s it!  Did you ever want to be a slave?

Me:  Well, no I don’t think I ever did want to be a slave.

Mr. TOF:  Well, why NOT?

 

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We were at the park in Pettibone, a city of six streets.   A stray cat ran across the corner of the park. 

Mr. TOF:  Look!  Mom!  That cat doesn’t have a leash!  Where is the leash?

(Of course, most cats don’t wear leashes, but in his world, pretty much all the cats are required to be donning a leash, so it makes sense.)

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Dr. Peds was construction street barricades out of large styrofoam pieces for the Fourth of July kid parade.  

Mr. TOF:  What are those?

Dr. Peds:  Barricades.

Mr. TOF:  Bear cages?

Dr. Peds:  Barricades. For the street.  They block the street.

Mr. TOF:  (Thinks for a while).  But Dad, how do they keep the bears off the street?

 

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Dr. Peds uses Siri to text on his phone.  He does a fair amount of texting, especially when he’s on call.  One day last week he was texting someone and speaking into his phone. Mr. TOF was playing with toys on the floor.    Dr. Peds got to the end of a long sentence and paused.

“Period!” Mr. TOF loudly exclaimed.

Wouldn’t you know, the sentence DID need a period.  His timing was perfect.  He might not have any idea what a period is, but he knows  “period” belongs at the end of a pause when texting.

Kids.  They are always listening.